SIT AT HOME IN ONITSHA; Barman’s Parliament

He who buys beer, moderates and dominates any political conversation in a beer parlor. I bid my time, listen to the conversation around 2023, General Election and the permutations.

I ordered one one bottle to go round(I was on my 3rd bottle), I needed to show them that I had capacity to buy more, if they toed my line.

So after Chairman, Odogwu thank you, I redirected  their conversation and haven won their comradeship, I can now speak without fear of being lynched or misunderstood.

Oyinatumba thanks for the drink. I hope you are Obidient?

What is Obidient?

Just be Obidient.

Oyinatumba, vote Obi and Yusuf next year and that’s the meaning of being Obidient.

Ok. If that be the case, I am DISOBIDIENT. Obi and Yusuf, do not represent my interest.

Oyinatumba, where are you from? Are you sure you are a true son of igbo land? All of us here, are Obidient.

Don’t mind him, he is Hausanized Igboman living in the zoo, yet to be liberated.

I ordered my 4th bottle and gave them another one-one bottle round.

Oyinatumba, Odogwu thank you. But you for ask make them add peppered meat.

You know that you Obidients no de give Shishi? Me too, I no de give beer plus peppered meat to people. You choose one.

Hmmm!! They look themselves, look at me and continued their animated high-toned conversation.

You see, Obi will win in South East and South South. In fact oga abu mgbochabu. No son of igbo man go vote any other party but Obi’s party. We have never had it this good and close. If we lose Obi, we have no other option but to go back to Biafra.


I chipped in. Barman, give me N1,000 peppered meat(this got their attention)

Bros, you know if Obi wins the entire South East, he will still not win.

Who told you? He is the only Christian in the race. He will win South East, all the Christians in the North and middle belt, will vote for him.


Yes, Atiku, Tinubu and Kwankwazo are Muslims and they will divide their votes and Obi is our next president.

Barman, bring one plate of peppered meat for them. (They hailed me again.)

But have you asked yourselves, how many Christians have PVC and will vote? Will they not be busy praying for a better Nigeria than working for it?

Look at this man, are you a Christian self? You didn’t see what happened to Mbaka? Okwute is divine mandate for ndi igbo to get to Aso Rock.

Ok. If Okwute wins, will you still be agitating for Biafra?

No. Our agitation is because we are marginalized. Once we are accepted and Okwute made president, we no go talk about Biafra. Okwute will wipe away all the years of injustice done to us since 1966. We will be back in command.

Back in command?

What if Obi loses in a free and fair election? Will you still believe in Nigeria and it’s democracy?

God forbid, Obi cannot lose.

Bar man, how much is your money?

Odogwu, you don dey go? You no go give us one for the road?


Una know say we no dey give Shishi?

Nna forget that things, you must give to get good followership; goat only follows the man with yam peels and not one with a hoe.

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *